Break The Silence

 

break the silence

In the light of recent worldwide protests, it’s hard to talk “business” until I speak & break the silence. 

This may be ‘uncomfortable’ for some. It’s been uncomfortable for me for 30 years of living in North America.

This is my story, I don’t need sympathy. I tell it to bring more awareness. It’s not intended to blame or shame. 

I’ve experienced racism & abuse in North America. Physical & verbal. White people telling me to “get out”; “get out you B..”; “F.. Indian. Go back where you came from”. Why? Because I expressed my opinions & emotions. I was told “how I should express my voice and what tone I should use “. Then I am ostracized for calling people out on their disrespect. 

Why are “shoulds” imposed?

Being disrespectful towards me and yelling at me because I did not attend to them right away. Or have the right dairy-free creamer for their chai. 

The same people only thought I had value when they saw me in some magazine or because I wrote a book. 

I’ve been physically assaulted by men of different ethnicities – colours in different countries on 3 occasions. 

When I tried to tell my story to other women of various ethnicities, I was told to “stop talking.“ It “made them uncomfortable “. “you must have done something “ “we don’t want to hear it. You asked for it”

Women are so afraid to get involved. Maybe so they don’t get hurt?

However on one occasion ….When NOT a soul heard me or so I thought, it was my black mammas who came out of nowhere, formed a circle around me and stood up for me. “No one messes with our Ms. Tellis.”

I’ll never forget that. I taught their children. That was my last day as a teacher.

I try to make myself very strong inside & out. Martial arts. Meditation. 

Through all this pain I tried to NOT make assumptions or hate the ones who abused me based on colour, but try to understand how pain made them angry. It’s generations. It’s deep. You cannot hate an entire race based on the actions of one. It’s dangerous to stereotype. 

We’ve got to stop just for a moment. Pause. Think before words, actions and anger leave us. It’s difficult to undo that damage. We need compassion. 

Which of us have said sorry to those we have hurt & shown compassion ?

I feel deeply that love is the only way followed by ACTION. No judgement. Be present. Get involved with local groups to Change! Don’t wait for others to do it for you. 

Mother Teresa whom I worked with for countless years said “If you judge people you have no time to love them “

Dr Martin Luther King Jr said “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear”.

Start somewhere but start. Love yourself. Spread that light to others. It’s contagious. 

My love goes out to all of you hurting. If I have in any unintentional way every hurt you, I do apologize.

With Blessings, love, and respect,
Trudy Ann

#BreakTheSilence #howwefight #BlackLivesMatter

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